


The Best Alarm in the Universe

by TheTimelessChild0



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Desperation, Episode: s11e01 The Woman Who Fell to Earth, Urination
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-09
Updated: 2019-11-09
Packaged: 2021-01-26 07:07:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21370138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheTimelessChild0/pseuds/TheTimelessChild0
Summary: The Doctor shouldreallyremember to use the toiletbeforeregenerating. And before falling through the air.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 5





	The Best Alarm in the Universe

**Author's Note:**

> GUESS WHO'S BACK?!!! I AM! This was written based on a dream, so it should be more interesting than the NOTHING I've posted earlier XD

“She’s got  _ two  _ separate pulses,” Grace noted. Yaz simply nodded. It appeared that the reason for this woman’s oddness earlier, was because she was an alien. 

As soon as Grace let go of the Doctor’s arms, they began stretching toward her thighs, grasping at them, trying to move them closer together. The 4 watched in bewilderment. Graham interpreted the action as an attempt at massaging the legs, and therefore, he approached the sofa and removed the Doctor’s hands to squeeze her legs for her. Unbeknownst to him, this sent a large nerve signal from the thighs to her bladder.

The Doctor woke up abruptly. A twinge in her bladder made her need to push her legs together tightly. 

“Blimey!”

_ Oh, bugger! Why do I never  _ ** _pee before regenerating_ ** _ ? I definitely had time. Gramps ought to ‘ve done that, instead of his big speech. Or during even.  _

“Who woke me up?” She asked, frustrated. Graham raised his hand.

“I thought your legs were stiff ‘cause you kept squeezing them in your sleep.” he explained. 

“That’s not why. It was an unconscious reaction to needing to pee. I was attempting to  _ hold it in _ ,“ The Doctor explained.

“Speaking of which, where’s the toilet?” she asked, awkwardly, her thighs lifted against her stomach. 

“Come with me, dear. Waiting much longer can’t be good for your  _ hearts _ ,” Grace invited. 

The Doctor followed gratefully. She held herself half-secretly, with a hand simply lodged between her thighs. 

“Thanks a million. What was your name again?” The Doctor asked while thanking her. 

  
“Grace,” Grace stated. 

“Very helpful Grace,” The Doctor thanked her again, walking into the loo. 

The Doctor took some time to fumble with the fastenings of the 12th Doctor’s suit. 

Hearing the grunting, Graham walked over to the door. “Need any help?” he offered. 

“You any good at taking off men’s clothing?” The Doctor asked. 

“Well, yeah” He ignored the odd nature of the question. 

“Then yes, would like some help,” she accepted, opening the door.

In front of Graham was the woman, trying and failing to remove her suit. Graham quickly grabbed the suit and managed to loosen it. The Doctor slid the parts previously attached to her trousers, off herself with ease. Graham had to direct her, before she took the rest of her top off. 

The Doctor felt her bum underneath her pants, which she had successfully pulled down with her unbuttoned trousers, and looked up at Graham. 

“Think I’ve got it now, thanks Graham,” she reminded him. He quickly shut the door and left. 

_ Right, sitting down to wee. Nothing to it. Just like Donna would do it. _

She pulled her bottom garments all the way down and sat on the toilet hurriedly. And let go. 

_ Oh, Fantastic,  _ she sighed in relief.

The Doctor wee’d for several minutes.

She wiped, flushed and washed her hands  _ before _ pulling her pants and trousers back up. 

“Man that wee felt good,” she bluntly announced upon exiting. 

“That Scottish bloke should’ve thought of that before he turned into ya,” Ryan remarked. 

“Agreed,” the Doctor said. 

“What are you on about?” Graham said, confused. 

“She told us she’d changed,” Ryan reminded him. 

“This is sci-fi in real life, Graham! Gotta keep an open mind” Grace noted.

“I knew someone who would’ve said the exact same thing. Jill?..no..hold on..BILL!” she realized. 

“If she were here, she’d probably be annoyed with me making that second puddle in the gravel.” The Doctor reminisced. 

“Where’d she go?” Grace asked, with empathy. 

  
“To the stars, with her new girlfriend. ‘s what happens when you investigate a woman with stars in her  _ eyes _ !” She retold. 

“Oh, well. You’re better of on Earth anyhow. Nothing to fall out of on solid ground” Graham remarked. 

The Doctor got a huge smile on her face. 

“Except if I fall off the toilet!” she joked. Everyone, especially Ryan, laughed.

“Floor’s yellow, it can handle it” Grace assured her. The Doctor frowned, before understanding the joke and laughing so hard she keeled over backwards, completely unconscious. For about 3 seconds. Then she hacked Ryan’s phone. 

The End.


End file.
